Infinitely Complex

Why are all these people so complicated? Can't they see I should be the center of it all? I mean, I can think and breathe and talk all at once. I am an infinitely complex being, a conglomeration of hate and love and spite and envy and pettiness and joy and thought and wonder. Can't they see that my heart is a bottomless void, that my every change in mood shapes the world around me?
Can they be so wise, so kind, so cruel, and so wise? Surely not. No such being can exist; such an illogically logical misconstrued construction of vice and virtue would crumble beneath the cold hard simplicity of the world.
So why don't they make sense? I mean, I understand so much. I understand that there may or may not be a god, and that I have the right to choose my own path in life, and that sciences save lives, and the arts make them worth living.
It's so easy to say that, right?
I mean, I understand so much. I understand that there may or may not be a god, and that I have the right to choose my own path in life, and that sciences save lives, and the arts make them worth living.
I just said it again. It's so easy. As easy as pie, which is ridiculously hard to make.
But the point is, these people are so smart, and so dumb. On the one hand, I know some who can spell Drizzt Do'Urden of Daermon Nachez Baernon Ninth House of Menzoberranzan- frankly I can't- but don't even realize that I'm bleeding all over their shoes. That don't even see the pain rising like ghostly wisps of steam off my crippled, bent shoulders. Bent in by confusion.
I am not a simple being, I know that. I am a clockwork pact of conflicting sides and confused interests working in synchronous harmony, inches from each others' throats. More than that, when you put certain pieces together, you get more than you started off with.
People say that all things slowly evolve, nothing happens suddenly or unexpectedly. I say that there was a point in time when plastic did not exist, and two seconds later it did. Then the Chinese government got hold of it, and I suppose that was pretty easy to see coming.
But I am like that. BAM! I now know that Yosarrian has two ''r's''. My mind goes deep, stretching back through brackish, umber clod to gently stroke my soul, which goes even deeper.
As deep as the angry sea in the unspoken hours of night, when it tosses back foamy locks and dances to spite the moon.... or something like that.
I know that I am infinitely complex, a swirling, whirling tornado of possiblities and unforeseen predictabilities, a clambering curmudgeon of struggling dreams and desires, each battling the next for dominance.
I know that I am infinitely complex, and that the world is mine.


So why aren't you all cooperating?